One night I woke up in tears
From a nightmare which forced me to eat.
As I stopped shaking and tried to settle my fears
I knew no one but me could accomplish that feat.
Although my life was spinning, slipping our of control
I alone chose what passed in and out of my lips.
I had willingly been engulfed by a massive hole
Now my ribs were as pronounced as my hips.
An accumulation of a lifetime of not being enough
Became an irrational dictator in my head.
Believing I would win if I became slim and tough
My growing stomach turned to the comfortless bed.
They are so far from perfection
And I can't throw a single stone
From my glass house of deception
Where I huddle up, hopelessly alone.
I am disgusted, looking at them
Their anorexic, bulimic collapsing acts
Fail to stop Him counting each as a priceless gem
Worth saving, despite the integrity each lacks.
He sees the importance of all His girls
The King is enthralled by their beauty
Her value far above rubies and pearls
Meaning much more than perceived duty.
You turned my wailing into dancing;
You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy
The light out of darkness you are enhancing
As my worthlessness your loving destroys.
